Saturday, March 14, 2009

Tires and Testicles

As the saying goes, if it has tires or testicles it's going to give you problems. And so mine continue. Once again, I have had to call AAA. You can't accuse me of not getting my membership dues' worth of service. This time, I actually need to have a two truck haul Freddie the Mercury out of the ditch. I don't think "ditch" does the situation's really more of a ravine I managed to back into.

Here's the story. I ran out to the P-Chop to pick up some vittles. I come back, and pull into my driveway, immediately thinking perhaps I should have pulled in on the other end. But I figured, I'll be fine. Well, I pulled up behind the house and saw that two of the vehicles were parked in such a way that made me extremely nervous about pulling the tank up through to my regular spot. Irritating, but I decided it was no big deal, I'd just back down the driveway and pull around to the other side.

I start backing down at a pace that was probably a bit too fast, and just as I thought, "I really should slow down and make sure I'm backing out straight" when THUD. Car is now staying in one spot. I put the car in drive, and attempted to head back up the driveway. Nothing but the sound of wheels spinning (which is almost a lovely phrase if you're being metaphorical). I opened the door and looked at the back tire. It had every reason to spin as it no longer had any driveway beneath it. I hopped down into the ravine known as the gutter around the driveway, and examined the front tire. There is apparently still enough snow around for the tire to be stuck in four inches of it. Lovely. I decided to just suck up my pride and call AAA.

As is standard protocol (and I would certainly be one to I relayed in my blog entry "Lockout Strout"), I was informed the truck would be there within an hour. So I waited. Sure enough, forty minutes later, I spot a truck. I happily, albeit a bit sheepishly, went out to greet the driver. He checks all around the car, and then gets down on one knee and looks underneath the car. Then he turns to me and says, "I'm going to have to call AAA and have them send a truck with a boom because that's sitting on the ground and all I can do with the flat bed is pull it but I don't want to risk damage." That was fair enough, and somehow, seemed just about right. He then told me he'd have them call me to let me know when I could expect the truck.

That was 39 minutes ago. Still no call from AAA. I'm hoping to get a call soon, but if not, I'll certainly call them. Once this fiasco is sorted out, I look forward to calling my mother and letting her know what her genius daughter has done now to warrant a call to AAA.

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